Eh, Eh, Nothing Else I Can Say

Poking.

Don’t poke me. Say hi, tell me what you’re up to. What recent one night stand gone awry did you recently struggle to bounce back from? Who did you hear just came out, came available or drove their car into the wall of a dormitory building while intoxicated, who just fell down the escalator of the Times Square Toys R Us, what rowdiness went down at the Wright State Maydays, who watched Chihuahua and enjoyed it (no names), what roommate of yours is dating a Mr Softee driver to get free ice cream? Gimme the goods. What juicy gossip can I get out of a poke? Unless we’re talking about the other kind of poke, tee hee! Too far, well that’s me – always takin’ it over the line.

Where is the poke button anymore anyway? And superpoke, really? Did that function on FB need advancement?? Newsflash: if I didn’t want you to poke me, I also don’t want you to: throw a sheep at me, chest bump, hug, adopt a pet with, blow a kiss at me, high five, knit a scarf for, blow bubbles with, (you get the point). What’s with the negative ones?? I definitely don’t want you to do any of these to me: dropkick, b!*$% slap, roundhouse kick, breathe fire on, etc. Some of them are just gross and wierd: Rock the grannie pantie or fling a thong at. Maybe it means I’m going to hell but coming across the one “build a child’s future with” just made me laugh. These little actions you’re choosing to do in cyber space is not cute, not real, not funny, dumb and makes you look sorta pathetic – get some friends or frenemies off the facebook and do those things to them in the real world and perhaps then you’ll get a response; until then most of us will just ignore your superpoke. I say we’ll ignore your superpoke, because I’ll usually give a customary courtesy generic poke back. I will not however begin or participate in a poke war with you, so don’t do it.

Also, you don’t need to tell someone you’ve poked them; that’s the thing, you poked them – they’ll get a notification.

Ps nobody pokes anymore, that’s so 2004*!

*Year facebook was created

the all hating PEPSI, slut