I love it when Facebook changes their layout once every two years and everybody flips their shit. Website formats change all the time, people. I know it’s difficult to navigate something new at first but I have every confidence that you are an intelligent person and you’ll figure it out.
Everyone is gonna whine around about how much the new Facebook sucks. Doubtless there will be hundreds of people who will create groups and Facebook petitions to “Change Facebook back” or “I hate the new Facebook” or “1,000,000 people to boycott the ‘new’ Facebook” – and I will not join them. I didn’t last time and I won’t do it now. And I absolutely WILL NOT boycott Facebook…that would be like cutting off a limb. SO. BACK. UP. OFF. ME.
Things change...it's called life. Also known as progress, advancement, MAKING SHIT BETTER. Why don't you just calm down Grandpa, take your blood pressure medication and stop reminiscing about how when you were a kid you had to walk 15 miles to get to school. In the snow. Barefoot. Uphill both ways. With your 13 year-old kid sister strapped to your back. You know what? In two weeks you’re gonna forget that Facebook ever changed and you’re gonna move on with your life. Until the next time they change it, of course.
And what really gets me is BITCH, THEY WARNED YOU! You get a little notice at the top of your newsfeed that says:
Hey idiots. We’re changing some stuff soon. So check it out here (and when it’s blue and underlined…that means you should click it because it is a link) beforehand so you don’t have any excuse to bitch later.
Well, I may be paraphrasing slightly. But you get the point. And seriously, why don’t you get riled up about something that ACTUALLY MATTERS? Like ending world hunger or offing Frank Caliendo. (Seriously, does anyone want to do that for me? I hate him. He is not funny, he’s just fat and that doesn’t always equal funny. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHO YOU ARE IMPERSONATING, JACKASS? ALL YOU DO IS PUT ON A DIFFERENT WIG. YOU’RE TERRIBLE. WHO DECIDED IT WAS OK TO GIVE YOU YOUR OWN SHOW? AND FOR THAT MATTER, WHO WATCHES YOUR AWFUL EXCUSE FOR COMEDY?!) Sorry…don’t get me started on Frank.
I know that coming from someone who helped start a blog about what not to do on Facebook, it sounds horribly ironic to ask you not to get upset about something happening on Facebook. SHUT UP, I DO WHAT I WANT. If you truthfully think that we take ourselves THAT seriously – maybe you should just go away now before I add you to my hit list.
But seriously, don’t have a cow man. Yes. I just referenced Bart Simpson. WHAT.
I got your crazy,
The Blonde
P.S. Two entries in a row, how special do you feel?
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Frank. Dude. We get it.. you was that kid that made everyone giggle by doin shitty impressions in class all day... Don't make me relive middle school.
ReplyDeleteAnd- Facebook aint that different. Its kinda like when a kinda alright lookin girl gets a real nice fresh haircut. She still the same girl... She just a little less busted lookin.
I'm totes with you on the Frank Caliendo front. He's not funny. He's not attractive. The only impression he does that is accurate is Dr. Phil. That's only because they're both fat, ugly, and untalented.
ReplyDeleteThat is all.